The List

Dan and I recently made our lists. If you don't know what this means, let me refer you to this video (linked due to embedding being disabled).

Video: It's Laminated

Ok, so when we made our lists we used our phones. Here is my list:

I, like Ross, have had a hard time deciding who makes the final cut. Originally Joel McHale was not actually on my list. For some reason I had a temporary memory problem and didn't realize how hot he was? I was reminded last weekend while up late watching old reruns of a local sketch comedy show called Almost Live! that Joel was on before he became all famous. His hair wasn't as good as it is now, but he was so cute even back then. And cute + funny = a winning combination for Jessica. Also, it was really weird seeing him in the same sketch with Tracey Conway, who lives in my neighborhood and I regularly see walking her dog. Like, why can't Joel just be walking his dog in my neighborhood, dammit?

The problem with adding Joel is that I had to decide who to cut, and I'm still not 100% sure I made the right decision. Dan thought I should take off Donald Glover because my other celebrity crushes have been on my internal list much longer, but NO ONE MESSES WITH MY DGLOV! So that wasn't an option. Another thought would be to take off Paul Bettany, because while I think he is possibly one of the hottest men in the universe, I tend not to obsess over him quite as much. But then I thought about his butt in A Knight's Tale and well, HIS BUTT. There really is no question about Hugh Laurie and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. JGL is just a given, see exhibit A and exhibit B. And um, Hugh Laurie? House? Yes please. Wooster? I'll take a double order, thanks. Mr. Palmer! Totally. I could go on, but I think just the photo speaks for itself. Who could turn down those eyes?

So I removed Jake Gyllenhaal. Yes, I know, he may actually be the most adorable person in the known universe, and now I'm starting to regret his removal for Joel. But Joel is so cute! And did I mention funny? Community is the best sitcom in years! But do I really need two representatives from the same show? Also, he is a freaking family man. That actually makes me feel slightly guilty for lusting after him. For some reason it doesn't bother me with Hugh, his family has been around for a while and his kids are grown and stuff. And while Paul Bettany has a wife and children, his wife Jennifer Connelly is on Dan's list! We could just swap for a night, no hard feelings! But Joel, his wife is all cute and they are all young and have young babies and they are just so SO cute.

That is my dilemma. Which isn't really a dilemma because well, you know. Dan couldn't even make his full list, he just put Jennifer Connelly and Scarlett Johansson. Of all the hot famous ladies in the world he could only come up with two. So picky, that one. I mean, I guess that says something good about me? I don't know.

I suppose lamination is out, then. Luckily I can update my  list on my iPhone notepad, or else I'd really be in trouble. So fickle.

Oh, Joe

Joseph Gordon-Levitt, I just LOVE YOU SO EFFING MUCH.



Originally found HERE on JGL's tumblr.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt aka hitRECordJoe

Those of you who know me might now that I sometimes fixate on certain celebrities. Crushes, if you will. I went through a really wild Alan Rickman phase a few years ago that may or may not have to do with my little Harry Potter addiction. Or perhaps that his portrayal of Colonel Brandon in the film adaptation of Sense and Sensibility was pretty much amazingly sexy? I then had to run out and watch every movie I could get my hands on that he was in. Eventually the obsession faded, but when I watch Love, Actually I still get all twitterpated even though his character is a stupid jerk who should not even THINK about cheating on Emma Thompson with that secretary harlot.

Anyways, you get the general idea.

So I have in the past had this obsession with JGL. I can trace its roots back to 3rd Rock from the Sun, although I wasn't really a huge fan of the show and didn't watch further than some episodes in the first season. I'm just saying I thought he was cute even back then. Because he was. Funny, I just watched a video on his tumblr blog that was from a Rolling Stone interview (that I highly recommend watching) where he mentions in passing that he looked like a girl back then. No, Joe, you looked like a really adorable adolescent boy with pretty hairs. Now, when I think about it at this moment I think it is weird that I thought an early teenage boy was totally cute, but then I realize that he and I are the same age and it really isn't all that strange. My boyfriend at the time had a similar slightly feminine aesthetic and the girls in my high school ate it up. (He was pretty delicious, I must admit.)

That isn't really when my obsession started, though. I mean, I totally liked him in 10 Things I Hate About You, but I wasn't all super swoony (I was over Heath Ledger... dang, now I'm all bummed). No, it was when I saw Mysterious Skin that my obsession began to blossom. That movie is super depressing, and JGL plays a homosexual teenage prostitute. He is 100% fantastic in this film and after watching it I had to watch more. I totally recommend Brick and The Lookout as well. Brick really made me feel all swoony! You know, I never saw Shadowboxer because I don't think he had a huge role in it, but now that I see this photo I think it may be something I have to go back and watch.

OH MY GOODNESS!

So one day while I was bored at my old job I started googling him (boy do I wish that was something dirty) and I found a website he had recently started Hit Record and started reading about it. It isn't like a hit record that sells a million copies, it is like hitting the record button to make a record of something. It is all about art - music, film, photos, paintings, performance, etc. In the beginning there was a lot of his films, music and art creations, or "records" and I was just totally fascinated. He is handsome, talented, smart, interesting, creative. Dude, the guy has it GOING ON. Back then I was totally in a bad relationship and had just lost a crazy amount of weight, so I would just sit and fantasize all day about going to LA to visit friends or something and meeting him at a party and well, stuff. It was dorky and lame, but I loved having an obsession. Not a lot of young, hot Hollywood actors make me feel all fluttery inside because they just don't seem like real people and they aren't that interesting. Here was this man opening himself up for everyone to see. And it felt like a secret because it was pretty low key and wasn't flashy celebrity crap.

But I'm not super hard core like those "Twi-hards" and creepy "Twi-moms", so eventually my extreme affections faded into an appreciation for a talented actor/artist. I've watched his movies, like 500 Days of Summer where all I could think through the whole thing is that Zooey must be a loon for not falling for those dimples, and OH that dance scene, HOW CUTE IS HE? So yeah, I still really like him, but I'm not obsessed with him. Oh, Wait.

Seriously, though, have you seen Inception yet?

Cut to last Sunday, seeing Inception with Fiance and his brother. OH.MY.GOD. Designer suits. Slick hair. Floaty fight scenes. And I suppose I have noticed it before, but did you hear his low voice? Sexy. SEX-EEEE. It was a little like porn, not to mention the fact that there is plenty of other eye candy in that movie and it is also visually stunning and very interesting. So I'm back, guys. I am almost 30 and getting married, and he is almost 30 and all famous, but in my drifting mind he is like, one of my good friends or something, who has a crush on me and is secretly sad that I am getting married. Wait, what? This is my brain folks, for reals. Right after I got home I watched Uncertainty which was really weird, but there is a sex scene and lots of making out and damn, Gina. Just sayin'. I'm all hooked again. And it isn't just his looks, he just seems awesome. I can't quite put my finger on it. Or he's just adorable. I don't know, guys.

It is nice to see that Joe has made Hit Record into his very own production company featuring art from real people all over the place. He even helps them profit from it. I totally renewed my membership to the website today, and while I'm not sure I'm as creative as other people on there, I figure I can bring a knitter voice into the equation. Particularly because lately I've been feeling like doing some more artistic things with my knitting, rather than functional. I've seen some really amazing installation art done with knitting. I'm super interested in that.

Or perhaps I just rejoined to see more videos of JGL like this one from the terms of service agreement.